Last year, Mae and I sat down for this interview on the topic of marriage, money, and family life. It was a powerful time for us to reflect (I only got choked up once) on how far we’ve come as a couple. It also was a deep reminder of the positive influence money has had on our marriage–not just more of it, but how it taught us to work together.
As we arrive at another Valentine’s Day on the calendar, I wanted to bring this back to the forefront. I’ve also included the 8 key points we discussed as an outline below for my fellow skimmers. We hope it blesses you.
1. Early Financial Habits & Joint Finances
When Mae and I first got married, we committed to full financial transparency. We set a rule that if either of us wanted to spend more than $50, we had to talk about it first. That simple habit-built accountability, trust, and unity in our financial decisions. These core values scale as our net worth does.
2. Financial Challenges & Planning Together
Early on, financial planning was as simple as scraping together $100 to hit a wholesale auction and buy bulk goods on the cheap. We didn’t have the option of keeping separate accounts—there just wasn’t enough money to split up. These early roots of needing to work together are invaluable. Whether it’s goals or challenges, we’re working on this together.
Communication helped us stay aligned and avoid surprises that could cause tension.
3. Stress, Strain, and Recovery
For over a decade, we poured over half of our household income into keeping a Christian school afloat. It was financially exhausting and, honestly, created a lot of stress and anxiety. But it also built resilience, faith, and trust in each other. It’s not a season we’d want to repeat, but coming out the other side, our entire family had a different relationship with our money, time, and focus. Some lessons are, unfortunately, best learned through pain, but your ability to pull together determines the outcome.
4. Money as an Accelerator of Values
We have the privilege of working with many first-generation wealth builders. It’s always interesting to watch what character traits wealth brings out. Money doesn’t change who you are—it just magnifies what’s already inside you. If you’re dishonest, wealth will only make you more dishonest. If you’re values-driven, money becomes a tool for greater impact. That’s why Mae and I put so much work into staying tethered to our core values. We don’t want wealth to make us live be default instead of by intention.
5. Annual & Daily Financial Cadence for Family Alignment
Speaking of family effort, we developed a rhythm to keep our family aligned—not just financially but relationally. Each year, we take a retreat to set financial and life goals that help us align our priorities personally and towards each other. You can get the questions we work through here for your own family discussions. Following that, we do monthly check-ins over dinner, and we have a daily “1 to 10” emotional check-in. Whether it’s a small expense or a big-picture wealth strategy, we keep the lines of communication open, so no one is left guessing.
6. Teaching Our Kids Financial Responsibility & Business Mindset
Marriage also places a deep emphasis on parenting. We made the decision to start exposing our kids to financial literacy early on. They had to read business and personal development books—sometimes, we even paid them for it. When Bryce was 16, he read so many books that I had to pay him $4,800 in one year alone! But that investment paid off—by 19, he was structuring multi-million dollar business deals. We wanted to make sure our kids weren’t just inheriting money but developing the confidence and skills to manage it well.
7. Stewardship & Preparing the Next Generation
Mae and I also don’t believe in simply passing down wealth. We have worked incredibly hard to be first generation wealth builders, creating a snowball of capital that we hope will continue to create a values-based impact long after we’re gone. That also means we believe in raising stewards of it. Our kids know that if they align with the values and mission of our family, they’ll have a role in managing what we’ve built. But if their values don’t match, they won’t inherit the biggest parts of our wealth. It’s not about control—it’s about making sure the impact continues for generations.
8. The Role of Coaching & Personal Growth
I’m in my fifties now, and I think this is the most I’ve ever valued counseling and coaching. I can’t say I started with that perspective, but when our family life was at its hardest, outside wisdom made all the difference. Today, we’ve invested tens of thousands of dollars in coaching, mentorship, and leadership training for our family as individuals. We put them in rooms with world-class thinkers, take them to events with leaders like Simon Sinek, and constantly challenge them to grow. The goal is for every member of our family to be growing as individuals. This is enormous. For Mae and I specifically, growing together is one of the key ways we stay close.