Just recently, we recorded a podcast episode, Aging & Caregiving with Bob Kane, COO of AmeriBest Home Care. While highly practical, I felt the weight of the conversation. It’s always a delicate topic, but I feel it more as we have an aging family member of our own who lives with us.
Even in healthy family relationships, caregiving is a strain. It also prompts me to ask myself the question, “What do Mae and I want when we arrive at this season of life?”
There are many considerations in play–relational, financial, residential, medical, etc. My hope is that this brief reflection today will give you some food for thought about what you want your final season of life to look like.
With wise, proactive planning, we can emphasize a season of dignity, comfort, and as much peace as possible.
The Emotional and Financial Realities of Caregiving
Aging brings inevitable changes–physical, cognitive, and emotional. For some, these changes may require daily assistance or long-term care. Usually, couples try to do this for each other until one can’t or passes away. In that hard moment, the surviving spouse is often left looking around for who will next help them.
Often, this is family, but that is less of a dependable solution these days. Families are busy. They’re also increasingly spread out, and sometimes, there’s baggage that makes caregiving even more difficult.
The alternative (and more reliable option) is professional care. The problem is that most households tend to underestimate the cost of long-term care.
This is why we advise clients to start the planning conversation far in advance of ever needing it. The earlier you set your course financially, the more options you will have when the day comes to enlist additional care.
Planning Ahead: Key Considerations
To get your gears turning in the right direction, here are the most important conversations we advise clients to consider.
Long-Term Care Insurance
One of the best tools for protecting your assets from the high cost of care is long-term care insurance. However, this product is not for everyone, and costs can increase with age. It’s worth considering, but it’s certainly a matter of whether it’s the right fit for you.
Estate Planning
An estate plan isn't just about wealth transfer but also includes planning for healthcare decisions. I see it somewhat regularly: many who spend a number of years with long-term care often also end up needing assistance managing their affairs. When was the last time you checked your estate plan for power of attorney or medical directives?
Caring for Caregivers
Often overlooked is the financial toll on caregivers. Many family members—children, spouses, and siblings—find themselves balancing careers while caring for aging loved ones. This can lead to reduced income, lost retirement savings, and emotional burnout. It’s important to consider the well-being of caregivers when planning for care.
Managing Expectations for Family Caregivers
One other consideration for those who plan to lean on family support… We have seen instances where one sibling may bear the brunt of the load caring for Mom and/or Dad. We encourage clients to proactively address whether that inheritor is entitled to any large slice of the estate because of their unpaid labor. You might not suggest it, but we’ve seen it come up (especially in larger estates).
Utilizing Government Programs
Medicare and Medicaid offer benefits, but they do not cover everything. Understanding what these programs provide and their limitations will help set realistic expectations. Additionally, veterans' benefits and other government assistance programs may help offset some of the costs associated with caregiving.
In-Home Care vs. Assisted Living
Deciding between in-home care and assisted living can be an emotionally charged decision. Both have financial implications. In-home care allows individuals to stay in familiar surroundings but often requires modifying the home and hiring caregivers, which can add up quickly. Assisted living can provide 24-hour care in a community setting but is typically more expensive. This decision needs to consider both emotional preferences and financial capabilities.
Envizion More for Caregiving
Our final, most physically limited years may seem like a hard context to Envizion More. I would encourage you with two things:
- Start earlier than you think you should. Earlier = more freedom.
- Plan to need support. Adequate care is key to higher quality of life.
When we plan well, we bless ourselves and our families, who know we will be well taken care of. For more on this topic, I strongly recommend listening to our recent episode, Aging & Caregiving with Bob Kane.